AEC- I Decide

The Choices You Make Today, Will DECIDE Your Tomorrow!

                                                                M-O-M Blog                  

May 11, 2012

Tara Coles is the recipient of the grand prize package of the Moms In Business Grant.  The press release is online at http://mibn.org/site.php/snew/read/mibgrant2012-grandprizeannoun/

Congratulations to Tara!  We are sorry we didn't win but Tara did an amazing job. She just blew everyone away with her energy, her generosity and her social media skills. She really deserved this prize.

AEC did raise over $2000 and I learned so much from trying to pick up social media. I have dozens of followers on Twitter now and offers for help from a few of them.

Next on our schedule is a table at the Good Shepherd Episcopal Church's health fair in Binghamton. We were part of it last year and our band "Treasure" will be playing again. I will (hopefully) remember my camera and take pics.

God bless,
Arline

April 27, 2012,

Lots of challenges when it comes to abstinence education. I've been taking many webinars and getting lots of coaching from them and from Gina Robison at Moms in Business and today I got this e-mail when I inquired about a mentor with one group. I asked them if I could put it on my blog without giving their name because it is so illustrative of what we face.

Dear Arline,

Thank you for your email.  I’m glad you found the webinar useful.

As to getting a mentor, I can assure you we are trying hard to find one for you.  However, it is proving quite a challenge as the aims of the organization you represent are not acceptable to some people – in fact, I have already had 3 potential mentors turn you down as a mentee. I will keep trying though and hope to find one for you eventually.

I hope this clarifies matters.

Dear...........

Thank you so much for your help and your frank reply. I certainly appreciate the fact that you are willing to help us as this is exactly the problem we face. Many people will not tolerate our organization despite the fact that we help girls avoid the consequences of promiscuity and unwed motherhood, which are: sexually transmitted diseases (and diseases like cancer which result), heartbreak, depression, infertility, and lifelong poverty, not to mention the impact of these problems on subsequent generations. We realize that it is ignorance of the reality of the results of poor life choices and the fact that most people live their lives and make their decisions based on agendas which are primarily aimed at being politically correct and/or for profit. The peculiar thing is that there are few people, if any, in this atmosphere who would condemn anti-smoking campaigns or programs which teach good citizenship. Yet, abstinence is all about self-respect, self-control, and goal-setting, vital skills for every walk of life and in any and all situations.

I know that this is not everyone's viewpoint however, as illustrated by our acceptance as semi-finalists for the second year in a row with the National Moms In Business Crowdfunding Grant competition and by your own assistance and by funding from such groups as the Stewart Shops Foundation.

Thank you again for your assistance.

The Abstinence Education Council – C O M M E N T S
PO Box G, West Oneonta, NY 13861 – 607/433-1730 –

info@aec-idecide.org
Volume No. 6                         Issue 18                                   Spring 2012  
Newsletter ONLINE

It has been suggested that we change our newsletter format and make it shorter and more frequent -  after polling several people, we decided to try this. I will continue to put a longer version online.
February 18  - M.O.M.-  workshop went very well – with 9 participants. The program was inspired by Dr. Benjamin Carson’s mother and the workshop in turn inspired our project, a book on M.O.M- Model, Organizer, Mentor for this year’s Moms in Business Crowdfunding grant competition. We are again semi-finalists PLEASE NOTE:  there were some changes in the contest and it is ending April 30, so you can still support us with a donation. We have 30 supporters so far and have reached 30% of our goal. It would be wonderful if we could get some more support. You can go to Peerbackers.com and register and then click on back project for the Abstinence Education Council. We are getting some great donations of both money and stories.
“What is Beauty” workshop for girls 8 to 12, in Sherburne at St. Malachy’s Church Hall on March 31 was very successful with 12 in attendance. We are making plans for doing this in Oneonta in the fall.
Our conference on character education with Dr. O’Connell on April 25, was unfortunately, not well-attended, but the material was great and I am hoping to get the attendees help to bring it to Oneonta.                                                                            Arline Saiki, Director
Budget- I am waiting for a more detailed presentation of our budget, but briefly our income is about $3000/year from donations from Main St. Baptist Church, St. Mary’s Respect Life, Afton Baptist Church, Burlington Flats Baptist Church, Stewart’s Shops and about 30 individuals plus sales of products. Fixed expenses are accountant $300/year, phone $306/year (down from approx. $510), Fairs $620/year. Office supplies, brochures, pamphlets and rewards about $700/year. We no longer have a secretary (saving about $2000/ year). Office space, utilities, equipment, and some art supplies are donated. Salaries, gas, and taxes about $1000. (We don’t pay salaries if we don’t have money).

NOTES from Deborah
Hi everyone,|
      First, I would like to thank you for anything you have done, are doing or will do to support A.E.C. It means so much to us that you would take the time out of your busy schedule to acknowledge that you care. Vince and I went to Battlecry this past weekend and experienced what our teens really want. There were thousands of them worshipping the Lord. The theme was "Normal Is Just Not Enough!" 
     When asked what they were planning to change, two from our youth group said they wanted to stop using drugs. A few hours after making this declaration, one of them asked me if they could borrow $10 for cigarettes. She said she would go crazy without them. I looked her straight in the eye and said, "Cigarettes are what killed my Dad. Nicotine is a drug. What about your commitment? Her friend then said, "You have to quit". She agreed.
    I gave her a hug and said we will be praying for you. "I don't want to put another nail in your coffin. Do you understand, I love and care about you too much". She understood. This is what AEC is all about. Getting people to stand for purity, integrity and truth.  God Bless you, Deborah

NEWS

Deborah and I are both in Toastmasters now, I find the program which teaches speaking and leadership to be incredibly well-designed and helpful. I would like to offer the Youth program locally and several of the Toastmaster said they would help me implement it. So far, we have not had a response. Cornell University recommends it to their MBA candidates.

"Girl Talk" is a fantastic anti-bullying and self-respect program for middle school girls who are mentored by high school or college girls. We would like to facilitate this program as well, but again have not gotten any response to offers that we have made to some of the schools.

Proverbs 31 wife - Baylor University student Alex Eklund, concerned about the reaction of his female friends to the Victoria's Secret models, posted a comment on Facebook (I'd rather have a Proverbs 31 woman than a Victoria's Secret model") which went viral and has started a wave of interest among college students. We added this to our "What is Beauty" program.

April 15, 2012  As we head into the last 10 days of the The National Association for Moms in Business Crowdfunding grant, we are busy contacting mom bloggers and trying to interest them in donating to our book project. We are also reminding people to register at Peerbackers before April 25. I'm now offering "If It's Soy Sauce, It Must Be Asian" rice and noodle dishes to anyone who registers! 

April 12, 2012 - This has been a busy week, trying to promote our book project, taking webinars on marketing; being interviewed on Blue Zoo radio about the contest, finding out that my letter responding to a Ben Stein article and promoting our book project,  will be printed in Newsmax in June, and  trying to keep up with new Twitter followers and Social moms, and that's just for the contest!. Why am I getting tweets from Thailand and London?  And is there any way to get rid of the tweets from people who have been re-tweeted and are on my page, but are not the kind of people I want? Yikes only 2 more weeks and people are having trouble getting on to donate.
I am still trying to get the hang of blogging on top of everything else. At least,  I found my blog page, but don't remember how I put the tags on!
Still searching for mom's stories.

West Oneonta, NY, March 12, 2012 — The National Association For Moms In Business (NAFMIB), the leading association representing the fifteen million entrepreneur, executive and CEO moms in the United States has named Arline Saiki as a national semi-finalist for a chance to win a $50,000 package of business growth tools and cash for the Abstinence Education Council.

The grant is expanding and innovating the way mom business owners can get capital for their businesses. The Moms In Business Grant uses the internet phenomenon of “crowdfunding” to give mom business owners a better chance at launching a new business or current business project. It’s the first and only business grant competition to utilize crowdfunding.

The Abstinence Education Council aka AEC-I Decide's mission is to reduce high risk behaviors particularly regarding issues related to human sexuality, with emphasis on abstinence before marriage, by providing information to our community about making choices which are best for individuals, families, and the community as a whole, for their future happiness, health and success. AEC serves Broome, Chenango, Delaware and Otsego Counties in Central NY.

AEC’s goal is to receive $5,000 in the Moms In Business Grant crowdfunding race. Last year, AEC came in second in the competition, raising more than the $2000 goal. AEC is also offering a unique twist to their fundraising efforts this year based on their M.O.M. - Model, Organizer, Mentor workshop. This is a contest within a contest. This year we are using our grant to produce a book about the job of mother as models, organizers or mentors. Wanted are your stories and tips about what you or your mother did to focus or form your family or yourself or how you  (or mom) built the faith which inspired your family or yourself. Help us to create an inspiring and practical book of stories and tips about the job of mom to help guide other mothers and to help fund AEC‘s work.

The Moms In Business Grant Race will start March 12, 2012 and conclude on April 25, 2011.   NAFMIB is calling for local support and asking the community to provide backing to AEC’s grant funding profile.  More information about the grant can be found at www.momsinbusinessgrant.com or to share your story go to this link and check out rewards on the right hand side of http://peerbackers.com/projects/m-o-m-model-organizer-mentor-we-need-your-story-1548539166/
# # #


About National Association For Moms In Business
The National Association for Moms in Business (NAFMIB) is the voice of the 15 million entrepreneur, executive and CEO moms. Founded on the core values of Growth, Balance, Wisdom, and Enrichment, NAFMIB offers education, networking, support and advocacy for moms in business.  NAFMIB is a division of The International Association of Working Mothers is a charitable, tax-exempt, 501(c)(3) organization dedicated to making a significant difference in building and sustaining healthy communities by unlocking the potential of working mothers through advocacy and education.  Through our programs, we serve as an advocate and resource for economic and social justice by providing opportunities for working mothers to cultivate leadership to build strong families and strong communities. Go to www.MIBN.org 

About the Abstinence Education Council (trade name - AEC-I Decide)
The Abstinence Education Council gives workshops and presentations on character development, life skills, health, goal-setting, and relationships for ages 8 and up including pre-teens, teens, single moms and parents in Central NY, primarily Broome, Chenango, Delaware and Otsego counties. We also set up outreach booths and tables at county fairs and at community, college and church venues.


About peerbackers.com
peerbackers is a new way to fund entrepreneurs. It is an online funding platform that allows business owners to raise capital from their “peers” – in small increments – in exchange for tangible rewards to those who contribute. It was founded by Sally Miller Outlaw and Andrew Rachmell of Palm Beach County, Florida.

The Abstinence Education Council – C O M M E N T S
PO Box G, West Oneonta, NY 13861 – 607/433-1730 – info@aec-idecide.org
Volume No. 6                          Issue 17                         Winter 2012    

                                            Newsletter ONLINE

We are working on a new outreach to moms based on research which we have reported on before. According to a study from the University of Wisconsin in 2009 by Dr. Janet Hyde, kids who watch “too much television, (have) low self-esteem, low grades and poor family relationships” are most likely to get involved in early sexual behavior. We hope to give our area moms a boost in confidence and some tools to help their families. We will be giving away tips on nutrition, book lists for kids and teens, information on personal growth, have games, prizes, and more. We are blessed to have a wellness center in Edmeston and are partnering with Born Again Books, Shears 2 You, Preferred Toastmasters and LIFE plus some special guests to present a workshop at that location called “3 Steps to Help Your Family Have a Healthier and Happier 2012” for moms on February 18 from 10 AM - 12 PM.  The program will cover - Discovering yourself- M.O.M. the rock (Model, Organizer, Mentor); Developing yourself- the whole person; and Defeating Deadly Diseases- body, mind, soul, and spirit.

The Brookings Institution study frequently cited by Rick Santorum, tells us that three behaviors will reduce the likelihood of living in poverty by 98%. That is to graduate from high school; not to have children until marriage; and to work. Other studies have shown that it is parents that have the “greatest influence” on their children.  With the poverty level at 15% of the population, it is up to us.

Could Hollywood be opening up to the truth? “The Pregnancy Project” details the daring, true story of a young teen who pretends to be pregnant to highlight the stigma that a teen mom suffers. A recent study by the CDC (Center for Disease Control) found that half the teens that used birth control became pregnant; a third thought that they couldn’t get pregnant; and one in five “didn’t mind” getting pregnant (One of the reasons for The Pregnancy Project” was to highlight the outcomes of teen pregnancies: social outcast, emotional, mental, academic problems etc. to discourage the behavior).

We continue to work with the girls at Circle of Friends at the Burlington Flats Baptist Church.  Our next meeting is February 10. Many thanks to Pastor Jay Henderson, for his continuing help and support.

We will be presenting our “What is Beauty” workshop for girls 8 to 12, in Sherburne at St. Malachy’s Church Hall on March 31.

I am tentatively planning to try for the Moms In Business grant again this year. We came in 2^nd last year and raised $2,000. My endeavors resulted in an interview for their monthly magazine, which may generate some interest in our organization.

We have applied for 2 local grants, as well as assistance from a website class at Binghamton University. We will be hearing from them all in the next few weeks.

Dr. John O’Connell has asked me to make arrangements for his free conference on implementing character development in classrooms and in the schools. As I noted in my last newsletter, his program changed the culture in the school system where he was Superintendent, raising SAT scores dramatically and lowering school disciplinary problems.                                                                                                  Arline Saiki, Director  

NEWS

Tuesday, January 24 - A 16 year old Ravena-Coeymans-Selkirk High School student attempted the sexual assault of a 17 year old girl in the school elevator. Fortunately, another student intervened and was able to rescue the girl. Children are programmed to do what they see and with the constant barrage from tv, movies, and video games of highly sexualized content, not to mention graphic material even being presented in some schools, this incident is hardly surprising. One has to wonder if the boy’s lawyer is going to try to get him off by citing provocative clothing as “inviting” the assault. When I was growing up, that was a common defense and “fashion” nowadays is almost entirely provocative.

November 10, 2011 – University of Maryland news release – psychologist Kurt Gray with researchers from Yale and Northeastern released the results of a study which found that both women and men who wear revealing clothing are thought to be less intelligent, less competent, lacking leadership skills, and as being less morally responsible. In academic and job situations the perception is that such people are incapable of planning and acting and therefore would result in negative evaluations.  This buttresses a 2008 study done at the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse which found that 1. First impressions create immediate opinions and beliefs 2. First impressions are long-lasting   3. Provocatively dressed women appear less intelligent than conservatively dressed women. 4. These impressions can positively or negatively affect acceptance in jobs or graduate school. This also echoes

A May 20ll study by Kenyon College in Ohio which found that one third of the clothing being marketed to tweens is sexualized and that girls who chose this kind of clothing were more likely to have “body image problems” and be “perceived as less intelligent” and “less moral.

Late last year the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS) announced a drop of 9% in teen pregnancies for 2010. "Progress in reducing teen pregnancy has been nothing short of remarkable -- the teen birth rate has declined a stunning 44% between 1991 and 2010. There have been impressive declines in all 50 states and among all racial/ethnic groups. Not so long ago, teen pregnancy was viewed as intractable and inevitable. This report shows that too early pregnancy and child-bearing are 100% preventable.” Sarah Brown, CEO of The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy.

NOTES from Deborah
Greetings,

The New Year has definitely started out with a "Bang". Every day we are seeing the fruit of the deceptive messages being taught through the media and teachers who are ignorant of the devil's lies. January has been a month of brainstorming and preparation for an all day youth seminar at The Landmark Church called "That's What Love Is". We will be sharing topics such as "My Value", "God's Sacred Creation (Marriage)","God's Way versus Our Way", "Renewal" and much more.

Also I will be attending a girls’ tea party in Greene on February 11th to get to know them before our summer tea party with AEC. At our after-school program in Binghamton, we are sharing relational topics weekly. It is so refreshing to see the youth respond positively to the truth about purity.

Last but not least, Vince and I had the privilege of leading small groups (He with the guys and myself with the girls). We hit on the difficult subjects of homosexuality, crisis pregnancy and idolatry. These teens deserve to know the truth. Their futures depend on it.

Thank you so much for your prayers and support. You are impacting many lives for the best futures.                                                                                                                           God Bless you, Deborah

The Abstinence Education Council – C O M M E N T S
PO Box G, West Oneonta, NY 13861 – 607/433-1730 – info@aec-idecide.org
Volume No. 5                          Issue 16                         Fall 2011   
Newsletter ONLINE

     As we watch the Sandusky/Penn State scandal unfold – we have to wonder why the schools in NYC are implementing a graphic sex-ed curriculum for ages 10 and up. Because I work with children at some churches, I have had to take classes on child protection and the very first thing that a predator does is “soften up” his victim by desensitizing him with porn. In one fell move, the city of NY is doing the prep job for potential abusers. It’s astonishing. Who could be behind such a potentially catastrophic decision? Even closer to home is the introduction of the pornographic, anti-Christian novel, “The Handmaid’s Tale” to the Schenevus high school. Pornography is addictive and leads to violent behavior, not to mention imitation. Recent protests by parents had no effect on the school board. With the introduction of desensitizing materials in the schools today at earlier and earlier ages, I’m afraid that our future news stories will feature more and more sensational scandals.

     Many thanks to Advisory Board member Anne Timmins for coming up from New Jersey to help us at Spiedie Fest. Anne recently won the Hawaii playwriting contest for the second year in a row as well as several other writing fellowships. Rose Hogan of Afton also helped us out again at both the Afton Fair and Spiedie Fest. And Jean Jones was again instrumental in getting the donation for us for our booth at the Afton Fair from Afton Baptist Church. Thanks to all!

     We were invited this year to participate in the Community Volunteer Fair at Binghamton University and were happy to have 10 girls sign up as volunteers. We hope to have them help us with some of our projects there. The Davis College Christmas party was cancelled due to the flooding problems, as they are putting their resources to helping the victims. We hope to have a table there next year.

    We unfortunately lost our contact for the program we were planning in Oneonta, but still hope to do something there soon. We found a great mentoring program for middle school girls which we would love to implement.  We have been invited to do a presentation at St. Malachys’ Church in Sherburne. We are working on the details. We have also been invited to be part of a retreat with the Heritage Girls in Schenevus. It will probably be sometime early next year. We will again participate at the Christmas sale at St. Joseph’s in Schenevus as well.

     We are continuing with Circle of Friends at the Burlington Flats Baptist Church. Sharon De Gristina came up with the brilliant idea of taking the girls at our last meeting to the Veteran’s Day program conducted by the American Legion at Edmeston Central School. The girls whipped up trail mix treats with little prayer cards, listened attentively to the wonderful inspiring speech by Gold star mother Mrs. Mayne and gave out the treats as gifts to the veterans and American Legion members at the event. We are so proud!

     This is an amazingly generous offer of Dr. O’Connell to the schools in this area. In a previous newsletter, I had noted that his efforts as superintendant of schools in implementing this program resulted in a dramatic rise in SAT scores and a corresponding decrease in discipline problems, in just 2 years. Please let me know if you have any contacts in your school system that we could inform.

FUNDRAISER- GHIRARDELLI CHOCOLATE GIFT SETS -20% OFF – You can place your order at Born Again Books or New 2 You in Edmeston, with free local delivery or contact me at the above number or e-mail address, if you are interested. Chocolate orders must be in by 11/26. There are also some “NuCell”  non-toxic shampoo/conditioners and moisturizer for a donation to AEC of 40% to 50% off retail available at Shears 2 You. Many thanks to Debbie Perlmutter and Suzie Carpenter for their help and support. All of the stores are in the same complex, at 20 West St. in Edmeston.

Why is Abstinence important? That is the question that was asked by the Abstinence Clearinghouse of its members this past summer. My response, which was published in their August 30th newsletter, was: Abstinence education is about self-respect, self-control, selflessness, and self-discipline. It is about becoming a productive, mature, successful adult. These qualities are assets in any organization, in any field, in any sport, in any business. They are vital for a stable, solid, prosperous society. On the other hand, insecure, out-of-control, selfish, undisciplined people are a recipe for disaster both in the home, at work, and in the community. Abstinence education is important because it equips our young people with the tools they need to face the many challenges we have in society today. It's not just about avoiding disease, unwanted pregnancies, heartaches or a host of other ills and problems. It's about being a real person with a real life, who grows into an adulthood that is stacked for, instead of against, happiness and success.

I find it difficult to understand why there appear to be people who are against this.

NEWS

     A recent study from University of Maryland psychologist Kurt Gray and colleagues from Yale and Northeastern University published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that both men and women who wore revealing attire were considered less intelligent, less capable and lacking in leadership capabilities. This is one study that should be impressed upon the minds of our young people. Job searches are difficult enough without one strike against you before you even open your mouth.

     Re: the “Occupy” groups, I urge those who think that this is a good thing, to look at the effect it must be having on our young people. Day after day watching angry people causing chaos and disruption with reports of assaults, public nudity and violence is both disturbing and a bad role model. Children imitate what they see. How hypocritical for adults to be telling children to “behave”, while applauding those who don’t.     Arline                 

NOTES from Deborah
Hi everyone,
  I can't believe it is almost Thanksgiving.  What are you thankful for? 
This week has been very eventful.  The Lord has given me a core group of girls to work with at the after-school program I work at on Monday and Wednesday afternoons. Three of them have started coming to our Wednesday night youth group where Vince and I shared "It's Just Sex, Right?".  We had a lot of interaction and are going to continue it in December.
       On Fridays we have been teaching Hollywood's love versus true love.  The teens have learned a lot!  I just came from a small group meeting where a woman shared the pain of soul wounds, generational curses and abuse.  There sure is a lot of pain in this world.  Please pray for Abstinence Education Council to have more open doors to speak and teach the benefit of purity.  Last month I did two 30 minute television shows informing the public about various topics pertaining to relationships, moral values, respect and much more.  We can't thank you enough for believing in this cause and your encouragement, prayers and support.
     May God reward you richly for your faithfulness. In Christ’s love,  Deborah